My North Korean Holiday: The Funniest / Worst Place on Earth?

My North Korean Holiday: The Funniest / Worst Place on Earth?

A group of French tourists has just arrived in North Korea at a hotel only for foreigners. We’ve slipped in amongst them. It’s already 10:00 p.m., but we feel like taking a little walk outside. Okay, goodbye. The porter follows us looking worried. Turn that thing off. Here? -Stop! -Stop? He waves us back

As it’s forbidden to leave the hotel on your own without an official guide. Nevertheless, we insist. Thank you. Stop, stop, stop, stop. -No? -No. -NO? -No. The tone is polite but firm and reluctantly we go back in. Thank you. Inside, two North Korean dictators, father and son, dominate the lobby.

Mr. John works for the state and is in charge of the French group. I wanted to go for a walk in town, but they said no. Everyone knows you’re a spy. We’ve arrested spies nearby. Here, every foreigner is a potential spy. North Korea is the world’s most secretive state,

And an example of the worst kind of communist dictatorship. Since its creation in 1945, the country has been living on another planet. Acute paranoia and abject poverty are its distinguishing features. There are no statistics for its economy, but what is known is that famine is a constant threat to the population.

In the late 90s, at least one million North Koreans are believed to have died of starvation. Even today, according to the UN, 20 percent of the population has little or no food, in particular, those who live in rural areas. It’s why the World Food Program distributes about 400,000 tons of food each year.

We managed to film these scenes in secret. Lacking machinery and even animals, local agriculture is virtually non-existent. People eat what they can find, seaweed, and roots. It’s a starvation diet. Officially, the country is still headed by Kim IL Sung, the dictator who died in 1994

But is designated the Eternal President of North Korea. He’s represented everywhere in the form of monumental statues, frescoes, and posters. His son Kim Jong Il succeeded him and is officially known as the Dear Leader. He continues to wield almost surreal, autocratic powers, thanks largely to the backing of an ever-growing army

Believed to be over a million strong, massively equipped, including with nuclear weapons, and technically still at war with South Korea. Kim Jong Il continues the work of destruction begun by his father. The result is people living in conditions comparable to those in the Soviet Union during the 1930s.

The same queues for the few buses that have gas, the same empty stores where it is forbidden to film as the public never ventures inside. Not everything, of course, is so bleak. There are highways, but used only by cyclists and the clean-up squads clearing away the puddles.

There is even a casino in the capital where you can have fun with slot machines, except there’s never a jackpot. There’s also golf, the most capitalist of sports enjoyed only by the system’s elite. For the 23 million North Koreans times are tough, but smiling is mandatory. Outbursts of joy are carefully choreographed

In grandiose street parades. It’s in this nightmare world inhabited by people brainwashed since birth, that a group of Western tourists has decided to come on vacation. At €8,500 for three weeks, it’s as expensive as the Seychelles. Only here, there’s no luxury, no coconut palms, only unfriendly minders to check every photo,

No mattresses in the bedrooms and no running water. There are blankets in here, look. Wow, that’s enough for me. Naturally, surveillance cameras to watch you. Welcome to North Korea, the dictator’s Paradise. The organizer of this trip of a lifetime is the man with blonde hair. Guillaume de Baudry arranges specialty tours

Of the worst places on earth. In his group is Claude. For this young retiree it’s the most important trip of her life, as for the first time, she can follow in the footsteps of her father, who was originally from North Korea. Jacqueline had no qualms about accompanying her friend Claude.

A former librarian now also retired, this will be her first experience of a real dictatorship. There’s also Henri, who prefers to remain anonymous. It’s not his first dictatorship, having already visited and much enjoyed Iran. North Korea was missing from his trophy cabinet until now. Our minders are two French-speaking guides.

In the glasses is Mr. Ho and on the right, Mr. John. Three weeks of propaganda lie ahead. Pyongyang, the DMZ, the demarcation line between the two Koreas, the extreme North, and the coasts along the Sea of Japan. The first Westerners to ever make such a remarkable journey.

Our trip to the land of Communist bliss begins with an invitation to share a joyful experience with the North Korean people. What, after all, could be more appropriate than the gigantic Luna Park, the only funfair in the country. Here, everyone smiles. Welcoming gestures make the foreign visitor feel at home.

The fair features attractions from another era, archery, games of skill, with balls as old as the players. Ancient swings and rides fitted with machine guns, very popular with the adults and watched over by the supervisor. The infrastructure is creakily old and it doesn’t look very safe.

Still, never mind, it’ll take more than that to spoil the fun of the French group as it climbs onto the Ferris wheel. On board, everyone is having a good time. We’re still going up. Yes, we’re already halfway. Will you be okay? Now it’s stopped. Maybe we’re broken down. Everything here is so quiet,

Not like the funfairs back home where it’s so noisy. Henri seems captivated by the calm, and good-natured atmosphere of the fair. Even Mr. Ho, one of the guides, is enjoying the moment and wants to immortalize it. I’m filming the joy of this funfair. Crowds jostle, proffering money around the cotton candy booth,

Kids with money, and even young rappers. Is this really North Korea, the world’s most evil communist regime? Look, there’s even the riff-raff, it’s unbelievable. Here, there’s a queue, not for food, but for the bumper cars. Soon, though, the harsh realities of life in North Korea return,

When a group of soldiers on leave appears. Watch out, there are soldiers. No filming now. To find out why the soldiers are here, we follow along until we get to a rather special booth. Mr. John, what’s written up there? Down with the imperialists and down with the American aggressors. Really?

Why is there still all this hate? The war is over. No, the Americans occupied our nation, they divided the country. The peace has never been signed, it was just a ceasefire. The Americans started the war and made our people suffer. The grunts fire away with toys at the lead soldiers

But they are ready to fight for real. It’s a war North Korea has been preparing for since the state was founded 65 years ago, and the sworn enemy is the United States. By 1950, the world was beginning to painfully emerge from World War II. Two blocks faced off the communists and the pro-Americans.

Korea finds itself at the center of this ideological conflict and is consumed by a war that will last for three years. The South is supported by the US, the North by China. In 1953, Korea is officially partitioned, and to this day no official peace treaty has been signed, only a ceasefire.

Technically, the two Koreas are still at war. It’s a situation the French tourists will soon get to know more about. Right now we’re about to enter into the two kilometers of the demilitarized zone of North Korea, which is used for farming. On the right is the flag of North Korea.

On the other side, just a few meters away, is the enemy, the traitors of South Korea. The tourists have to form a single file, closely observed by the soldiers. The atmosphere is tense and each photo is checked. This is the world’s most sensitive area, surrounded by 1 million soldiers on both sides,

Ready to do battle. The small group finally arrives at the demarcation line, the famous DMZ. It’s a solemn moment. On both sides of the border highlighted in red are guards. They don’t look at each other but remain on the lookout. The first one who puts a foot over the line

Will be immediately spotted by the slew of cameras and killed. The soldiers’ uniforms are completely different. The retro style of the North Koreans and the Ray-Bans and US equipment of the South. The Americans are actually in charge over there. On the South Korean side, a group of American generals arrives.

They have their photos taken with North Korea as a backdrop. It’s as much as they’ll ever see of the communist nation. For the tourists, it’s time to leave. First, Claude wants to sign the visitor’s guestbook. It’s an important moment for the French woman with a Korean father and a French mother.

Claude has made this journey in memory of her father. It’s eighty-nine years after my father had to leave the country which was occupied by the Japanese, I’ve come to this demarcation line that divides Korea. This division always caused great sorrow to my father, who never saw his native land again.

Claude’s father fled Korea in 1920, long before the communist regime. The photo was taken shortly before he found refuge in France. He was never able to return to his country of birth. It’s an emotional moment, but the tourists are soon reminded they are in a state where everything is controlled.

Their guides and the soldiers demand to see the pictures taken at the border. Many will be erased. To the tourists, this unrelenting surveillance comes with the territory, and so far, none of them complain. The tour continues following the program arranged by the North Korean authorities, and the next stop is the War Museum.

At the end of the courtyard, an old woman is cleaning the stones. Suddenly, one of the guide’s assistants forces her to leave. She was spoiling the scenery by being poor, and that is something outsiders aren’t meant to see here. The very image of the country is at stake,

An image of perfection that nothing is allowed to distort and an image that is constantly monitored. Hello, welcome to our museum. Behind her is a gigantic mural, as one would expect, to the glory of Kim Il-Sung, the founder of North Korea. He has a godlike status,

Not least because he rewrote his country’s entire recent history. Please sit down, we have a film now about the Korean War and this will help explain the Korean problem. Visitors to the museum are served a rather partisan version of the conflict with the United States.

It’s a version in which the Americans are the bad guys. The voice, the style, the video everything resembles a bad propaganda film from the 1950s. Who then started the war in Korea? These scenes will help provide the answer. Listen to how North Korean authorities have rewritten history.

World War II earned the United States huge amounts of money through the sale of weapons. However, after the war, the United States lost its weapons market and entered into a period of deep economic crisis. They then deliberately started the war in Korea to help their economy, and they actively prepared for war.

Everything is false. The United States has never been as prosperous as it was after the Second World War. However, it matters not, and the documentary carries on in the same tone. Truman, the US president, declared in a message to Congress in 1945 that there needed to be a war in Korea

So that the United States could dominate the world. It’s the exact opposite. Historians agree North Korea triggered the war. A reality the regime in Pyongyang categorically denies and being the perfect dictatorship is something it teaches all children in the country from an early age.

The tourists are stunned, but decide it’s best to say nothing. Not one word. Obediently, they continue the tour where more surprises are in store. At the double, they cross rooms filled with war photos and posters. The rewriting of history continues. The Americans staged air raids in the China Sea

To bomb the towns and villages and massacre the Chinese people. Henri has never heard about Americans massacring the people of China. He takes his carriage in both hands and wades in. Excuse me, in which year, more or less, did this happen? Which year was this battle? The battle?

It was during the war, 1950 to ’53. Okay, so there’s no precise date, just during the conflict as a whole. The answer is evasive and makes Henri draw up short. However, he dares go no further and is teased by a journalist. You didn’t follow up on the question. You were scared.

I just don’t have the courage to. North Korea is a totalitarian state which scares even foreigners. The country has virtually no international friends, and if you get into trouble here, there will be no diplomats coming to demand your release. The young woman is waiting for us in another room,

Inside real ships and aircraft. The propaganda lesson continues. This is the weapons room where some of the original weapons are on show. These all distinguished themselves during the war, like the torpedo boat. It was one of four that sank the US cruiser, the Baltimore. While the young soldier recites her lesson,

We dare ask a sensitive question. Were the same ones used recently to also sink the South Korean warship? There was a South Korean boat that was sunk. It’s the first time I’m hearing about that. We’ve never heard of that. Only a few weeks earlier,

A South Korean naval vessel had been sunk off the coast of Pyongyang. On board, 46 sailors were killed. Tensions between the two countries were at their highest just when the French tourist group was visiting. Following our off-camera question, we were summoned and spoken to for several hours by North Korean agents,

Who warned us never to repeat such questions in the future, and the penalty of extending our stay here for several months. For now, all proceeds as if nothing happened. The museum guide continues her tour, but the mood has changed. She proudly presents one of the Air Force’s old fighters.

This plane is a MiG. It was visited by Comrade Kim IL Sung in 1952. The aircraft, a MiG 15, has been in continuous service in North Korea since 1952, as this video shot at the airport by our reporter seems to show. It’s an aging military,

But one which should not be taken lightly, as shown in the last room. Now, in this area, we have captured enemy weapons that are trophies. All these weapons are used in action like machine guns, helmets, flags, tanks, or helicopters, an Aladdin’s cave of Implements of death.

It’s also yet another opportunity to portray the wickedness of Americans. They used chemical and biological weapons during the war, and this plane was shot down as it was dropping bacteriological bombs. True or false, it’s impossible to get beyond the blatant propaganda. The highlight of the visit is saved for the end,

A huge mural depicting the Battle of Seoul, The Limelight, focusing on the heroic soldiers who saved the communist North Korean regime and protect it to this very day. The tourists are beginning to understand where they are. Tired, they return to their hotel. It’s rush hour, but oncoming vehicles surprise people.

Everyone is heading home from work and quietly gather to wait for their bus. Are the people queuing to get into a stadium? They are waiting for the bus. Pyongyang never has traffic jams. In the middle of the road, a woman is clearing broken glass.

There was an accident and everything must be cleaned up as soon as possible. On the left, the large building is the People’s Palace, and this is the city’s main thoroughfare at what passes for rush hour. The few buses are packed and look like they’re about to fall apart.

On the roadside, there’s no advertising but huge propaganda posters for the communist regime. We see men proud of building the future in this perfect country. A country in which women are there purely to raise the children. The two towers on the right is their hotel, one of the most luxurious in the country.

Inside is the restaurant, and notably a TV set constantly tuned in to national television. The programs are patriotic songs before a military audience, generals making speeches, a documentary on, naturally, Kim Jong Il, and How Best to Use a Kalashnikov. The French appear to pay no attention whatsoever.

Back in their rooms, the tourists discover they are not allowed to send emails, even to their families. All here is dictated by the state, and the laws make it obligatory to give the email addresses of the recipients to a local official. Henry seems to find nothing wrong with the strict new rules.

I told my friends beforehand that no news is good news. [French spoken audio] The country is cut off from the rest of the world. The following morning, Pyongyang is waking up. The same background music is broadcast every day, beginning at dawn. It’s not yet six o’clock in the morning.

The sky is darkened by the opaque swirls from the blast furnace plants. Already, small hands are busy scrubbing the still deserted streets. A woman is directing nonexistent traffic. Her movements are those of a puppet gone mad. Everything must be perfect in this capital of the communist regime.

The extreme poverty of the country is difficult to hide. Between two rows of buildings there’s a curious sort of vehicle, a septic tank on wheels, which used to be a truck. A few steps away, a group of men, heads shaved, dressed identically, practicing their morning exercises in rhythm. That’s North Korea,

A crazy contraption whose wheels somehow keep turning 60 years on. In a country where religion is banned there is, however, a god. He’s called Kim IL sung, the local Stalin. He ruled the country from 1945 until his death in 1994. His image is everywhere in the country, statues, photographs, and murals.

More powerful than a mere life president, he appointed himself president in eternity. Like everyone in the country, the French tourists will have to pay him homage. What will you do with those flowers? I’ll lay them in front of the statue of Kim IL Sung.

Next, is the approach to the statue of the Great Leader. At more than 15 meters high, it’s hard to miss. It’s solid bronze and surrounded by a mural in his honor. The protocol is precise, and the ritual formal. We stop here. Hello. First, we’ll put the flowers down, and then come back.

Go and place your bouquets, the three of you. Step back a bit. Altogether now, in a line. Then, we’ll count to three, and at three, everyone bows. -How many times? -Only once. One, two, three. Paying tribute to one of the worst dictators of modern times doesn’t seem to upset Jacqueline. I love it.

Saluting a dictator? It’s amazing. The Asians like to bow. Even when they say hello to each other. Everyone does it in Asia. What if we had to bow before President Sarkozy, back in France? How would you feel? I wouldn’t do it, I don’t like the cult of personality. Maybe for Carla.

After the French group The Carousel continues, another group of Koreans arrives for the obligatory pilgrimage. A perfect salute, but it’s time for the cleaners to move in and tidy up for the next party, so it goes every hour, every day of the week. For now, the tourists’ visit is passing off smoothly.

The North Korean guides can show off their country in the best light. It’s a far cry from the more usual image of a dictatorship teetering on the edge. The tour of the communist Paradise continues. Next up, is the pizzeria, the only pizzeria in the country.

Dining there is a privilege reserved for elites and the few foreign visitors. This restaurant is essentially a whim, created on the express orders of Kim Jong Il, the North Korean dictator, simply because he loves pizza. As in any hot spot, filming is forbidden. Everything started because he liked Italian food so much.

Then, he had an Italian chef from Naples come over for several years. Then, he said to himself: “Why not train a Korean chef in Italy?” The chef left for a little time to get the training. Then, an Italian expert came to examine the kitchens here.

In the beginning, the Italian chef said: “No, it’s not right.” “We need to carry on until we find the perfect recipe.” The only pizza man in all of North Korea will prepare the tourists’ dinner. In the kitchen, the staff heat the oven despite two power cuts.

The pizza man is one of the dictator’s favorites, one of the few North Koreans to be allowed to leave the country. Two years ago, I went to Roma in Italy to learn about pizza. Okay, thank you. A cheese and ham pizza will cost about five euros.

Guillaume says that in this land of famine, it’s not every day that you can eat as well as this. This is the only chance we’ll get to eat cheese in this country, so enjoy it. Payment is in dollars or euros, but not the local currency which foreigners aren’t allowed to use.

North Korea might be opening up a little, and not just because of the pizza business. People are now allowed to amuse themselves, by boating on the River Taedong or with pets like this little dog. Rollerblading youngsters can be seen on People’s Square and mobile phones are no longer a rare sight,

Although only local calls are allowed. There are even places where people can have a good time bowling, and pool, all a sign of the regime relaxing a little and highlighting the growing influence of consumer products imported from their ally, China. The tourists pay scant attention to these changes. What they want is tradition.

Souvenir hunting takes them to the Pyongyang Embroidery Institute. When they arrive, there’s some bad news. There’s no sign of any embroiderers. I want a refund, and there never will be. Can we see just one or two embroiderers at work? Just one, just one? Are there any ancient examples of embroidery in the museum?

-Yes. -Oh, good. The only evidence of the famous embroideries is two little kittens in the dark. It’s hard to make anything out. A lighter isn’t bright enough, and it’s impossible to enjoy the work. On the stairs, an employee finally arrives with a flashlight, but even that doesn’t help.

The only option is to take the embroidery towards the light. It’s pretty if you could make it out. At €150 Mr. Ho, the guide, is trying to make a sale. [French spoken audio] It’s painstaking work. It’s pretty, but it’s not handmade.

The tourists are disappointed and don’t need to be asked twice about complaining. I was very disappointed. We didn’t see any old examples, no clothes, maybe one or two. Nothing. [French spoken audio] They realize that here things aren’t the same as at home. Information is not freely available.

Everything is filtered and controlled by the totalitarian regime. The Internet is prohibited. At the Central Library of Pyongyang, there are many computers, but are they linked to the Internet? A quick test on Google gives us an equally quick answer. No response, nothing. There is no network because the authorities won’t allow it.

They want to control their citizens’ minds, and it starts at a very young age. In the streets, children much younger than six are already learning to march in step, chanting patriotic songs to the glory of the great leader Kim. A few blocks away, a kindergarten.

These kids aren’t singing, but having fun on slides and other playground games, all of which appear in perfect condition. Again, the image of happiness on Henri, who’s just had a chat with the guide, is under their spell. He told me about the youngsters in town and it’s not like in France,

You won’t see young homeless people sleeping rough, there’s certainly no kids who take drugs here, and the children respect their teachers. All I can say is it’s true. Poverty is carefully hidden from foreigners’ eyes and almost impossible to film. By contrast, model schools are a perfect showcase to present to tourists.

Inside, the children are beautiful, polite, and always smiling. The teaching tools are incredible. In this room, the kids learn to recognize the country’s fruit trees. A little further a collection of stuffed animals. A collection of all the local wildlife. What better way to teach children to recognize them?

There’s a brief show for the benefit of the admiring tourists. The headmistress calmly continues the visit. The kids welcomed the visitors warmly, if not spontaneously. In this class, children under five are learning about the major episodes in the life of Kim Il Sung, which are then recited with gusto.

Using a video, the teacher adds a few details. The Eternal President can be proud of these little kids. Through them, the country’s socialist future is assured. Their brains are already conditioned to obey. Claude, who was a teacher all her life, is struck by these methods of teaching. They learn a lot by heart.

They learn everything about history, about the president, and about the great leader. They start when they’re three years old to teach them about where he was born, where he lived, what he did, and everything is repeated. They repeat everything until it’s fixed in their minds.

I still remember the first thing I had to recite at school. Claude makes sure what she says can’t be heard by the guide who is nearby. This room is the dormitory where the children take afternoon naps, as well as sleep at night time. From the age of five they spend all week here,

Never going home. The state takes over the role of parents. A little further, other children play, dance, and sing, among some fantastic toys. The military influence is all-pervasive. Exact replicas of MiG fighters, some kids dressed as army officers, while others board a huge electric train. It’s better than any Western school.

There’s so much happiness and humor. You almost have to pinch yourself to believe it. It’s tough to criticize when presented with so many happy little faces. To conclude the quick tour of this model of education, there’s nothing like a little show. It features a gifted young violinist.

The kids who are all made up, all repeat a choreography learned by heart and all behave like miniature adults. Guitarists, twirling dancers. Virtuoso singers. Everything stage-managed to the tiniest detail. Even the smiles appear forced for these little puppets meant to embody the ideals of North Korea.

Hundreds of hours of work must have gone into this to achieve these sorts of results. To finish on a high, a piano solo by a five-year-old who reproduces every gesture of the professional concert pianist. The French tourists are enthusiastic. Did you like it? Oh, yes, it was magnificent.

The visit to the kindergarten is now over. We’d just like to thank the headmistress. Thank you. I was reminded of my childhood when we always did what the schoolmaster said. We would never have dared misbehave like run about or make noise.

It reminds me a bit of what it was like back in the 1960s and 70s. In the yard, a sign catches our attention and slightly dampens the recent enthusiasm. A guide translates the slogan on the poster. Our general, Kim Jung Il is the best in the world.

They want to be soldiers for General Kim Jung Il. It’s a slogan that reminds everyone they are in a dictatorship. A dictatorship in which the army plays a major role. Twenty-five percent of GDP is spent on the military, one of the highest rates in the world.

That’s ten to 15 times more in percentage terms than most European nations. In all, it’s estimated there are one million troops ready to do battle at the slightest sign of aggression. An old-style army from the Stalin era with hundreds of thousands of foot soldiers, both men and women. Tanks and missile launchers

And completely obsolete fighter aircraft. Yet the North Korean army is not entirely outdated. Since 2006, Pyongyang has had a nuclear bomb. This is precisely why North Korea is so scary, and why even the United States refrains from attacking. It’s something that makes Mr. John one of the guides, very proud.

We feel very good about having such a strong national defense. For example, we’ve now managed to possess our own nuclear weapons. A heavily armed and very secret country. Now, we’re on our way, on a plane owned by Air Koryo, which is on the blacklist of airlines banned from flying in Europe. Hello.

It’s a two-hour flight over mountains still covered with snow. Making the journey to her father’s homeland in the north is why Claude is here. We’re now close to Siberia and you feel it in the temperature. Foreigners are usually not allowed. In the special area, we now receive special treatment.

Three new guides join us. The slightest movement or even word will be monitored and, if necessary, reprimanded. We’re on our way now to Mount Paektu, the highest point in the country. It’s 2,750 meters in altitude. After the winter, we’re the first visitors to come by car

Which is why there are no tire marks on the road. The road is barely passable, and it’s not long before there’s some bad news. We can’t go up to Mount Paektu. It’s dangerous, and you can see that for yourselves. If we slide, it’s all over.

There are still 28 kilometers to go over ice and snow. It’s impossible. Claude is hardly surprised, though. Claude, is the road closed? Yes, it’s only to be expected seeing the amount of snow that’s around. They have no machines of any sort here to clear it. The vehicles aren’t properly equipped.

There are no snow chains or special tires, and they just don’t clear the snow. Can’t we rent some snow rackets? [French spoken audio] In the absence of a sacred mountain, the tourists at least try to visit the village. It looks deserted. It’s like an abandoned show village. Where are all the inhabitants?

There’s no smoke or anything. Where are the people? Only a can of cooking oil proves that there were people here once. We’ll never find out more. Mr. John immediately intervenes and it’s back on the bus. We’ll go and have lunch at the hotel then. What time is it, lunchtime? Rather than meeting residents,

The tourists will be subjected to another onslaught about the life of the dictator. It’s cold and damp, and some in the group are starting to tire of being manipulated. To begin with, the photos taken during this latest trip are deleted. A young woman dressed in military uniform

Is waiting to welcome them to the sacred site where Kim Jong Il, the regime’s current strongman was born. Smoking here is strictly forbidden. One more minute. One more minute. First, we’ll visit the house where he was born. On the way back, we’ll go that way.

This house is where Kim Jong Il was supposedly born. A shrine that is to be respected. Please, don’t stand on that. We’re told the dictator was born here and there were guerrilla forces in the region. Claude, who knows the country’s history, refuses to swallow this crude propaganda.

Wasn’t he born on the other side of the border? Yes, he took refuge over there, there were never any guerrillas here. Is it just propaganda, then? Yes, it’s written somewhere Kim IL Sung created the guerrillas in 1920. In 1920, he was only eight years old. Do they think we’re idiots? It’s incredible.

He must have been at least 12. Claude regrets having dared openly criticize the regime, especially as all around them are dozens of surveillance cameras. They heard what we said. Are there are microphones hidden everywhere? They’ll translate it. The friend Jacqueline, whispering, decides to make an unorthodox comparison to the local political system.

It seems like we’re in a fairy tale, only that the story never ends. The ogre is still alive. Still, so long as we’re not eaten up. That’s fine. Oh, there’s another house that looks the same here. Henri, for his part, has no such issues. He loves everything and is keen to show it,

But even he’s amazed when the guide, in the pouring rain, launches into a patriotic song about the great leader having to leave home and family. Very nice, thank you. That was good, everyone sings well here. Kim Il Sung wrote that song. As to the many statues of the dictator,

Henri salutes them without even being asked to. The minders can’t get over it. Do it with me now. Okay, I’ll do it again. Mr. Ho is delighted with this Frenchman who behaves like a true supporter of the regime. A few kilometers further on, yet another bronze statue in the middle of nowhere.

Again, it’s to the glory of the dictator, with giant, warlike frescoes. Claude has had enough of this cult of personality. This is just all too much. What do you mean? By their size, their style, the way they’re made. The cult that’s everywhere. Henri, of course, disagrees.

You need to remember that this is an art form. Yes, but I mean, they’re all the same, even the way they sing the songs. [French spoken audio] From the urban point of view, all the perspectives are respected and everything is ordered. [French spoken audio] It reminds me of what Hitler wanted to do.

Yes, In Berlin, his plans with Speer was the same kind of thing. [French spoken audio] I’ve seen the models. I just can’t get to like that sort of style or architecture. Me neither. Comparing the Pyongyang regime to Hitler, Claude is letting loose. When it’s time to leave, the bus will not start.

Fortunately, a group of soldiers pass by, at least a dozen, and help push the vehicle. Their assistance cheers up Henri. We’ve been in North Korea for over a week, but have so far still been unable to talk directly with ordinary Koreans. This will change, though,

As we head to the country’s coast along the Sea of Japan, with a promise of sleeping at a local’s house and being able to move about freely. The reality is quite different. Like all the country’s shores, the area is classified as top security.

To prove it, the road is lined by electrified barbed wire, which is there to protect against a possible landing by the South Koreans or Americans. It’s forbidden, for example, to film this village. It’s impossible to see what’s behind this white fence. Even Guillaume, who has organized trips here

For the past ten years, finds this too much. They make me cross, they really make me cross. Why, even a photo like this? Look, they don’t like it, they don’t like it. If it stays like this, I’ll never plan any visit to this region. Do they bother even you?

I’m going to complain when we get to Pyongyang. It’s too much. I understand they don’t want pictures of military installations. This is just the countryside. As usual, Mr. John has a ready explanation, this time to justify all the security. On the beaches and the coast it’s not allowed to take pictures.

Everywhere around here is a military zone. Too bad for the tourists, who will, however, still be able to spend a night with the locals. It’s an extremely rare privilege in this paranoid country, except that everything here is false. The village was built purely to accommodate foreign visitors.

This village was built for people who come here to see Mount Chilbo. It’s very nice, a special village with nice houses. The people here are lucky. As for the residents, they’ve been carefully selected. This woman, for example, is part of the regime’s elite.

The evidence, she had the incredible honor of meeting Kim Jong Il, the leader. An honor that’s no coincidence, since this charming lady is one of the best moms in the country, as Mr. Ho explains. From time to time, we organize mothers’ conferences. We select the mothers who have raised their children very well

And in the proper socialist way. Rather than endure yet more propaganda, the tourists plot their escape. The beach is not far. It’s too good an opportunity to escape the minders. For the first time, we glimpse the true face of North Korea, the grinding poverty that is destroying the country

And that must remain hidden. On the beach, women are picking up seaweed caked in sand and stuffing it into old sacks. The seaweed will be served up for eating. We are soon tracked down by one of our guards. We can’t go there, we can go fishing there.

-We want to see the fishermen. -Will you come with us? -Let’s go to the fishing boat with you. -No, no. -Oh, please. -It’s forbidden. -I have no… -Permission? I cannot go forward. If you go with me, and if you go along this road, afterward I… You’ll have problems? Okay, okay, okay.

The gesture has the merit of being clear, at least. The man will risk his life if the law isn’t respected. This is my last straw. Look toward this side, you can have a glance. He says there’s another village down there. This time we are promised, assured, and guaranteed that photos will be allowed.

At the entrance is a slightly odd map. The architecture is typical Korean. The tourists seem to perk up a little. It’s nice, I love it. I’ve taken lots of photos this morning. It’s beautiful and clean. There’s even a small demonstration of traditional local cuisine. Again, everything is stage-managed and totally artificial.

Nobody lives here. The tourists never see any North Koreans, apart from some employees who aren’t allowed to talk to them. Hello. We find a small passageway that leads outside, but it’s useless, someone is always there to block our path. Hey, hey, hey! -No? -No. Can’t I go like this?

Can we walk outside over there, go to the market? No, no, first, we need to drop off the bags. Okay, I’ll take a walk outside in the street and come back a bit later, okay? No, no, no, we go together, the door is locked now. Why?

I can go that way, I’ve seen another way out. No, no, no, you can’t, it’s not allowed. No, no, we won’t permit that. Mr. John! Mr. Ho said I could go for a walk for a few minutes outside. No, he never said that. Okay, I’ll go to the library then.

Is it not possible? I know what you’re up to. At least I tried. Mr. John, our guide, isn’t fooled. He knows the rules and the considerable risks. No images of real life. This fake village is a snapshot of the country. A prison from which you cannot escape.

The solid wooden doors remain closed to all North Koreans. A third generation of Kims will almost certainly continue to rule. Indeed, Kim Jong Un, the 27-year-old son of the current dictator, has been named his heir.

An unstable Soviet dictatorship, notorious for human rights abuses and known to be developing nuclear weapons, is probably the last place most people want to visit on holiday. But one travel agency, specialising in ‘danger tourism’, regularly organises trips in North Korea for tourists keen to meet ‘the last Soviets’. We join a group of three and travel around the country. Keen to experience first hand the realities of life in a totalitarian state, we even try to escape the official tour guide…